You can do almost anything in life but not everything. When two desirable values contradict each other, it’s necessary to strike a balance. Meritocracy, effectiveness, and efficiency are valuable qualities. But what do you do when they clash with pluralism, diversity, principles and values. You strike a balance. Caring for those less fortunate than you is an admirable trait. But what do you do when meeting another’s needs would put you flat on your back? Remember the flight attendant’s pre-takeoff instructions: Put the oxygen mask over your own face first; then you won’t pass out while you’re putting it over the face of the other person. If you’re flat on your back, you can’t help anyone.
We all want to put aside something to pass on to our children and grandchildren. But what if maintaining our own well-being requires all the resources we can muster? Care first for yourself. Otherwise, you may become a burden to your children before you can pass anything on to them.
You can think of many other choices: between self-interest and service to your country; between economic prosperity and preservation of the environment; between candor and honesty and concern for the feelings of others; between enjoying life to the full limits of your income and putting aside funds for your retirement years.
How can you make those choices?
You do it the same way you make choices between what you want in a house or car and what you can afford.
Do you really need a marble foyer, or would hardwood and an Oriental rug do the trick? Do you want double-paned insulated windows, or would you rather save that money and put it into a finished basement?
Do you need a 7-liter, 400-horsepower V-8, or would a 250 hp V6 serve as well? It may depend on whether you value fuel economy or fast acceleration. Do you want a sporty coupe, a roomy sedan, or a spacious, go-anywhere SUV? Each of these vehicles will do things the others won’t do. None of them will do everything you might want it to do. You have to decide which capability is the most desirable or practical for you.
Life is a series of balancing acts. You have to make choices of what to do and what not to do. You have to pick up some things you desire and drop others.
To summarise we have to learn how to become aware of the choices we must make and then make those choices consciously until we achieve mastery. After that, appropriate choices will come naturally to us.