Our teachers

People who bug us are our teachers. How so? They are able to bug us and thus tell us that we have not figured it all out.

They become our best teachers if we go deeper and ask what it is about what they did that is really bugging us.

The first answer will come from ego putting all the blame on their behavior. As we go deeper we find layers of feelings that we have not dealt with which surface when such incidences occur. If we keep an open mind and are willing to go deeper, we notice things about us that we have not dealt with.

Next we need to understand where these feelings stem from and how we overcome them.

After getting clarity we need to take action in removing these feelings. After doing the above you will notice that these reactions will disappear for a while but recur again reminding us that we have overcome these to some extent but not totally.

This can be a lifetime struggle, but the degree to which it bothers us gets minimized, and for great periods of time disappears to the point of not bothering us anymore.

Some key points to consider in this process:

1. We are responsible for being bothered; surprisingly, not those bothering us. If you allow them to be responsible, you become disempowered.

2. We have no control on other people’s behaviour, we only have control over our reactions, responses and feelings.

3. Writing a daily journal brings deeper clarity of these feelings and you uncover the real reasons for their existence

4. Seeing is not the same as observing. Observing means focused attention and spending time on understanding the deep cause.

5. By thanking people who bug us and then acting upon it and learning something about ourselves, makes us turn a minus into a plus.

This process makes the person who bugs you, your teacher.

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